|
This handy and amazing chart is something I found in Dave Richo's book, How to Be An Adult. This is a great starting point for looking at our projections. Most of us have difficulty spotting our projections - especially in relationship to our partner. It seems so REAL that they are ______. |
It is precisely when it seems so real that we are in the midst of a projection and need help coming back and owning our selves. This chart is a simplified version; I find most often our uncovered projections are unique to us. |
|
PROJECTED |
UNOWNED |
| If you are strongly upset by other's: | Then you have but may not be using your own: |
| Addictiveness |
Steadfastness
|
| Anxiety |
Excitement
|
| Approval Seeking |
Openness
to Appreciation
|
| Arrogance |
Self-Confidence
|
| Bias |
Discernment
|
| Bitterness, grudge -holding |
Refusal
to overlook injustice
|
| Caretaking |
Compassion
|
| Clinging |
Loyalty
|
| Compromise |
Negotiability
|
| Compulsive orderliness |
Organization,
efficiency
|
| Conning |
Teaching,
encouraging
|
| Connivance |
Intelligent
strategizing
|
| Control, manipulativeness |
Leadership,
efficiency, coordinating abilities
|
| Cowardice |
Caution
|
| Cruelty |
Anger
|
| Cunning |
Forethought
|
| Defensiveness |
Preparedness
|
| Demanding |
Asking
|
| Dependency on others |
Reasonable
trust of others
|
| Flattery |
Complimenting
|
| Foolhardiness |
Bravery
|
| Greed |
Self-provision
|
| Guilt |
Conscientiousness
|
| Hostility |
Assertiveness
|
| Hypocrisy |
Ability
to "Act as if"
|
| Impatience |
Eagerness
|
| Impulsiveness |
Spontaneity
|
| Incompetence |
Willingness
to experiment
|
| Indecision |
Openness
to possibilities
|
| Insensitivity |
Objectivity
|
| Intimidation |
Confrontation
|
| Jealousy |
Protectiveness
|
| Jumping to conclusions |
Intuitiveness
|
| Lack of order |
Flexibility
|
| Laziness |
Relaxedness
|
| Loneliness |
Openness
to nurturance
|
| Loquacity |
Articulateness
|
| Lying |
Imaginativeness
|
| Neediness |
Asking
for respect of appropriate needs
|
| Obsequiousness |
Respect
|
| Perfectionism |
Commitment
to do things well
|
| Procrastination |
Honoring
one's own timing
|
| Rigidity |
Tenacity
|
| Sarcasm |
Wit
|
| Selfishness |
Self-nurturance
|
| Self-pity |
Self-forgiveness
|
| Sense of obligation |
Choice
|
| Slyness |
Shrewdness
|
| Submissiveness |
Submissiveness
|
| Tactless bluntness |
Frank
candidness
|
| Taking for granted |
Accepting
|
| Vengefulness |
Justice
|
| from: How to Be an Adult by David Richo © 1991 |
Used by permission. |